This past weekend, I escaped to Mohale’s
Hoek via a hitch out of Quthing, and who should be driving right behind me but my principal’s husband. I swear, that man is
everywhere. After the truck I was in stopped, he pulled over and immediately
picked me up. I sat in the back with two very colorful bo’me. Jen and I decided
that, in the wake of the insanely popular game Pokémon Go, we should start our
own game, Bo’me-mon go, in which we “catch” (photograph) especially colorful
bo’me, and Jen will “arbitrarily assign points” to you. I assume more blankets
= more points. Bonus points for baby blankets, blanket skirt and blanket cape
combos, and outrageous blanket color combinations. I got into Mohale’s Hoek
where we celebrated a fellow Hoeker’s birthday with games like Cards Against
Humanity and, my new favorite game in the world, knuckle roulette, in which,
without seeing the other hand, the person on your right gives you a knuckle
pen-tattoo on your right hand and the person on your left does your left hand.
The 8-lettered combination you get is inevitably hilarious. Mine came out to be
“Fish Spit.” Well, you can’t win ‘em all.
It
was also at this time that the Olympics were on TV at the hotel, but the only
things on at the time we were watching were marathon running (boring), and
trampoline (a bit less boring, but they were only doing the compulsory
routines, so still kinda boring).
A
Mohale’s Hoek friend also gave me a new dog collar for the Bo Bo, as her mom
sent one for a different friend’s puppy who, sadly, died, and so never got to
grow into this collar. It’s pretty cute, with little whales on it. I have the
preppiest dog in Lesotho. I got back (via the rare unicorn that is the free
taxi hitch) to my village and put the new collar on the dog, who turned into a
TOTAL SPAZ MACHINE, jumping all over me, running in circles, almost bowling
over little kids, chasing sheep way more than normal, etc. Guess that’s what
you get with a non-neutered dog: too much doggie testosterone making it go
absolutely crazy.
Yesterday,
the safety and security officer at PC came to inspect the new house that my
replacement volunteer will live in. He stopped at the school and we talked a
bit. He asked me how it was being here without PC, with “no restrictions.”
Answer: absolutely great. Better than ever. The driver, the guy we call Ntate
Fingers, completely destroyed a little grass/compost pile by gunning through it
on the way up to the office. That should be PC’s new motto: drive everywhere at
all costs. Even though it seems like PC staff only talks to me in the way of
pleasantries and not logistics (they don’t even tell me now when they’re coming
to my school), it is always still nice to see them, and the teachers got a
“special lunch” out of the visit, which means we make rice, have grated beets
and carrots, beans, and chicken for lunch when important guests come to the
school.
I’m
trying to restrain myself on my new season of Modern Family, only watching one
episode per day. Popcorn restraint is more difficult, however. I have
absolutely mastered the perfect popcorn batch. The secret is to heat up the oil
with two kernels in there. When they pop, put the rest of the kernels in there
and take the pot off the heat for 30 seconds, then put the pot back on and keep
shaking it around. This way, the kernels all pop at about the same time, and
none of them get burnt. Bam.
Last
week I did a male condom demo in my life skills class with the Form Cs. I got a
box of expired condoms from PC a while ago for this very purpose, and I gave
exactly one to each of my 16 students so they could each try it. Given that
there are no bananas or carrots or otherwise easily-accessible penis-shaped
objects around my village, I had them use their first 2 fingers. Even though I
explained that it was dangerous to use an expired condom, as the risk of
breakage is greater, I knew that some of the boys especially would just try to
keep them, so I made sure not to let anyone leave the class until I had
collected 16 opened wrappers. This week, I demonstrated use of the female
condom, which was met with much more confusion and skepticism, as they are not
widely used or distributed as male condoms are. As always, I learn from my
students as I teach, so I was informed (and showed) that lubricated condoms can
also be used to shine shoes. Who knew?
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